Anecdotes:

up 2002-12-28 French news paper

2002-12-28 Le Canard Enchaine
Le fils du dictateur Nord-Coreen, reve de visiter un Disneyland
"Papa, si tu detruis la planete, eparge les parc Disney."

Cartoon; Son of dictator of North Korea, wants to visit the Disneyland.(near with a picture of nuclear missiles)
"Papa, if you destroy the planet, please relieve park Disney"

up 2000-12-12 Rank of Moodys

In Japan, a joke is popular among financial　people.As you probably know, Japanese banking system is still in　bad shape caused by collapse of bubble economy around　year 1990. Two major banks are bankrupted because of huge　debt, and government poured tremendous money 100 billion　dollar to prevent chain bankrupting. Two major companies　are changed into new companies by law.
The other banks are also in no good shape, and merge of banks is a trend.
Recently, Mizuho -group was establish with Japan　Industrial Bank, Fuji Bank and Daiichi-Kangyo Bank.　Funding capital of 20 billion $　(http://www.mizuho-fg.co.jp), aiming to become one of　world five top bank.
They hold many people to count yen bill rapidly and　exactly.
Florida state requested three banks to participate ballots　counting of presidential election 110 people each.
Totally 330 people joined the recounting of ballot cards.　They finished recounting very rapidly, because they　ignored the appeals from Republicans and Democrats. They　couldn't understand English.
After the election, Moodys rank of Mizuho Financial Group　go upward from AA to AAA, because they showed the　excellent capability for labor intensive area.
This story was welcome by other financial group but not　Mizuho Group, who is offended a bit.

2000-12-01 Microsoft (from my friend)
For those of you who have had experience with computers and their glitches and　idiosyncrasies, and downright illogical workings, you'll appreciate the following:

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated ?If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.?

In response to Bill?s comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the motorway for no reason. You would have to pullover to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought ?CarNT?, but then you would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive- but would run on only five percent of the roads.

7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single ?General Protection Fault? warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same sized butt.

9. The airbag system would ask ?are you sure? before deploying.

10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally roadmaps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Dept.

12. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car .

13. You'd have to press the ?Start? button to turn the engine off.

Up 2000-10-04 Meeting with Chairman Mao Tsu Tung (Kissinger and President Ford)

Former President Bush was a head of liaison office in Beijing. He met Chairman Mao two times at the visit of Henry Kissinger (1975.10.21) and President Gerald Ford (1975.12.2) as an aid.

When deligation of Dr. Kissinger entered Chairman Mao’s study room, Mao (81 years old) stood up with help of two secretaries.

Kissinger asked him about health, and Mao answered, pointing his head, “This works good and I can eat and sleep”. And next, patting a thigh, “ This is not easy to use, and works terrible for standing up. Also, lungs have a disease”. He joked, “ I am an exhibit for foreign visitors”.

There were many medical equipment, such as syringes and an oxygen mask in the study. Mao said, “In a moment, I will meet God. The invitation letter is on the way”. Kissinger answered with a smile, “Please don’t receive it”. Then Mao write with pains a few words on paper, and a secretary of him read it, “I will obey the order of DOCTOR”. “Doctor” indicated Dr. Kissinger and his abhor chief doctor.

After a month later on Dec. 2, 1975, President Ford met Chairman Mao. Mao said, “God’s invitation letter to me is on the way”. Ford couldn’t understand the meaning of Mao’s word, and with a smile he leave the study room, saying “I hope the invitation letter will arrive soon”. The relation between China and U.S. was deteriorated afterward.

Up 2000-09-30 Interesting History!

Here's a little part of US history which makes you go hmmm....
Have a history teacher explain this ---- If they can.

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's secretary was named Lincoln.

Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.'
Kennedy was shot in a car called 'Lincoln.'

Booth ran from the theater and was caught in a warehouse.
Oswald ran from a warehouse and was caught in a theater.

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
And here's the kicker.

A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland.
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

Creepy, huh? Send this to as many people as you can,
cause, hey, this is one history lesson people don't mind listening to!

Up 2000-09-18 Talk of Shinichiro TOMONAGA, Nobel laurete for physics in year 1965.

1. I have noticed that there are four type of answer for question, becoming president of university. First is "yes", second is "no", and the third is not "yes" and "no". The fourth answer is both "yes" and "no".

2. In Japan, it says when the wind blows, the cooper will make a profit. Wind make dust. Dust hurts eyes, and number of blinds person will increase. Number of Samisen (blinds use samisen) is increased, and cats are killed to make samisens. And then number of mouth is increased and wooden buckets are bitten. Subsequently job of cooper will be increased.
But cooper will lose money also. Wind blows, the copper will lose money. The winds will increase the number of fire. Water is needed to extinguish the fire, and buckets of copper will be taken away. Copper loses buckets.

3. A U.K. gentleman made a comment about character of Germany during Hitler's regime.
They are three natures, fidelity, intelligent, nazism in Germany, but only two natures exist in a person, not all three natures.
Fidelity and intelligent person will not becomes nazi.
Intelligent and nazi will not be a person of fidelity.
Fidelity and believer of nazi will not be intelligent person.

Up 2000-09-10 Heaven and Hell
A Brazilian died and was summoned to Heaven, which he found quite different from where he had spent his lifetime. Everything about Heaven was nice and clean -in fact, too nice and clean. The Brazilian quickly became bored stiff.
Determined to do something about his boredom, he walked to the edge of Heaven one day and looked straight down into Hell. Hell certainly looked different from where he was.
In one corner of Hell, he saw a man sitting on a comfortable sofa, watching the television and sipping a drink. A woman sat by his side.
So, the Brazilian told Saint Peter: "That man over there seems to be having one hell of a time. I must get down there for I am completely bored up here. Will you allow me to?"
With a grin, the saint replied: "By all means, if you insist. But just listen to me first. Mind you, the program he is watching is "Window on the Government," which as you undoubtedly know is the Brazilian government's publicity program. The woman he is with is the same old wife who's been with him 30 years -or longer. And the drink he is sipping is Brazilian-made whisky.
"Now, do you still wish to go?"
The Brazilian turned pale and muttered weakly:
"No, Saint Peter. Will you allow me to stay here?"

(up 2000-09-04, for the courtesy of my friend)
Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.　The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating　table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."
The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside THEM is color coded!"
The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."
The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like contractors. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when the job takes longer than you said it would."
But the fifth surgeon shut them all up: "You're wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. They have no guts, no heart, no spine, and the head and ass are interchangeable."

Mainichi Shinbun 00/08/19　(Abstract)
Story about "Tour Eiffel (built in year 1889"), on　the occasion of "Fire of Moscow TV tower"

French writer Guy de Maupassant (1850-93), famous for　novel "Une Vie", didn't like tour Eiffel(300m height). He　opposed construction of it, which was a monument of Expo., in year 1989, 100 year anniversary of French revolution.
After completion tour Eiffel, he was seen frequently at the restaurant of the tour.
Some one asked him, "do you change mind?"
He answered, "This is a only place, one can't see the tour"
Moscow TV tower (540m height, next to Toronto CN tower 553.5m) was built in year 1967, for commemoration of 50 years after October revolution.

(up 2000-08-04, for the courtesy of my friend)
By the year 1946 was President of Brazil a General, which name was Dutra:
-General Dutra,　was not very clever and he did not understand English. In that year he　traveled in Official visit to USA. The President of the United States, was the President Truman.
When The President Dutra arrived in the States, and met Truman, Truman said:
How do you do President Dutra? (the pronunce is how du you du.....)
President Dutra scratched the head and said
How Tru you Tru, President Truman?

(up 2000-07-25)
G8 summit meeting was held at Okinawa, southern part of Japan from last weekend, July 22, 23, 2000, and meeting itself was a great success.

Our Prime Minster greeted U.S. President Clinton on July 22, saying "who are you?" in stead of "How are you?", because Japanese are not good at speaking English, specially for powerful political people, who are too busy to learn English.

President Clinton, initially was embarrassed, and then answered that "I am a husband of Hilary" as a joke.

Then, Prime Minster Mori said "me too", because when typical Japanese has a problem to answer the question, easy reply is "me too" such as in case of ordering foods.